It's hot. It's dry. Your feet ache, there are 1,261 presents still to be wrapped and 4,278 relatives due to arrive at any minute…or at least it seems like that. And the garden is a mess

Step 1. Don’t worry

Congratulate yourself on not being an obsessive, and hand your visitors something long and cool. They’ll be too happy to peer critically at your garden.

Step 2. Cheat (necessary if one of the visiting rellies IS a garden obsessive, see Step 1, and their good opinion matters

A bit of garden cheating

• Cover weeds with mulch. One or two bags or bales should do it. If necessary, jump up and down on the weeds first or get the kids to do it, so they lie flat before you put the mulch down. Result: your garden will look tended… and with luck the mulch will actually kill the weeds or at least make them much easier to pull out when you do get around to it.
• Buy two great big hanging baskets of petunias – the hardy spreading kind that hopefully will bloom for a few years for you. Hang by either side of the front door for a 'welcome to our flowery house' look.
• Other 'instant colour' options include buying some biggish pots to fill with big-bloomed hydrangeas – good in either light shade or sunlight. Annuals in bloom now (and you really do get the most colour in a small space from annuals, even if they die back in winter) include petunias, marigolds, salvia, rudbeckia, asters, begonias, impatiens (perennial in frost-free areas), phlox, vincas and/or calendulas.
• Trim the edges of the front path and sweep. Yes, I did poke fun at those who do that in December didn't I? But seriously, it does make a garden look trim and neat – a useful tip if you’re selling your house and want it to look inviting.
• Get rid of any weeds in the paving. The easiest way to do this isn’t with herbicide – which leaves the brown dead weeds – but by scraping away with the edge of a spade. It’s easier to do than to explain how to do it…just sort of push the spade in front of you over the weeds and they'll be hooshed along into a neat heap that can be swept up. It only takes a few minutes (unless you have piazza-sized paving). One useful tip though – do it in the early morning. Paving gets HOT – and stores heat and this will ensure that those decapitated weeds are dead by sunset.

The garden cheat's great entertaining secret

Lighting is also a great way to show off interesting – and drought-proof garden features, like coloured courtyard walls, stonework or weathered wooden walls. Decorative bits. Garden sculpture, mosaics, archways, big wooden lintels over doorways – remember that shapes and textures can look even more striking at night, when they are framed by darkness or sidelit to accentuate texture and throw interesting shadows.

A Christmas tree for the birds

• small whole mandarins (the smaller the better) tied onto the tree with string.
• small bird seed balls (see last month’s gardening pages).
• pomegranates cut into quarters and tied on with string.
• any left-over or damaged bits of fruit like strawberries, pears, pieces of apple or kiwi fruit – the honey-eaters, lorikeets and wattle birds all enjoy sweet fresh fruit and they clean it all up pretty thoroughly each day so you won’t have to look at rotting fruit (although you will have to refresh your offering each morning).
• tinsel… for you to enjoy, and to glitter so that the birds realise there’s a treat for them nearby.

P.S. It's not a good idea to let birds or possums become dependent on handouts from humans, but a treat at Christmas will do no harm. Merry Christmas!

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