Belinda Neal: I will fight for my marriage

Tracey Curro
Wednesday, September 23, 2009
Photography: Peter Brew-Bevan/Styling: Julie Russell
Photography: Peter Brew-Bevan/Styling: Julie Russell
We have decided that, despite everything that’s happened, we are the most important people to each other, and that’s worth maintaining. — Belinda Neal
Tracey Curro
Topics:
Relationships
She may have her own public image problems, but nothing prepared Belinda Neal for her husband John Della Bosca’s confession of infidelity, writes Tracey Curro.

It’s not easy to reconcile the gentle image of the well-groomed blonde woman posed wistfully by the window of a Canberra hotel room with Belinda Neal’s reputation as the volatile federal MP and wife of recently resigned NSW Health Minister John Della Bosca.

As she responds to the “click, click” of the photographer’s shutter, there is no hint of the sharp edges or the outbursts that have shaped the public perception of 46-year-old Belinda, most infamously last year at Iguana Joe’s nightclub at Gosford, in her NSW Central Coast electorate. Yet Belinda Neal has had the kind of start to the month that would make anyone a little reticent.

It’s just weeks since the shock, front-page revelation in Sydney’s The Daily Telegraph that her husband had been having a secret six-month affair with a 26-year-old woman and had quit his job as a minister in the NSW state government. These past few weeks have transformed Belinda Neal. The tough-talking federal MP has had to confront her complicity in a neglected marriage, to face her own mistakes and personal failings, and take “a quantum leap” in learning a whole new way to love and be loved, if she wants her 23-year marriage to survive.

“We both love each other and we want to keep building on that,” she says. “We have decided that, despite everything that’s happened, we are the most important people to each other, and … ”, she falters, momentarily, as the words catch in her throat and tears well in her eyes. She takes a deep breath and rushes out the rest of her thought, “and that’s worth maintaining”.

It’s a rare moment of fleeting emotion during an exclusive interview with The Weekly, in which Belinda Neal, a mother of two, reveals her profound shock at her husband’s confession, the couple’s decision to stay together and the pact that she and John, 53, have now made to save their marriage.

She says she has decided to share her story of a cheating husband to help other women understand that their partner’s infidelity in no way devalues them. There is also a woman’s natural desire to regain her dignity, the sensing of an opportunity to rehabilitate her belligerent image.

Read the rest of this story in the October issue of The Australian Women's Weekly with Tracy Grimshaw on the cover.

Your say: What do you think of Belinda's decision? How do you work at your relationships? Share your thoughts below.

User comments
Females are naturally nurturing and have a natural urge to merge and are brilliant at relationships so it can't be her fault. It's all his fault. Just because she doesn't smile evrey time she sees him or just because she hasn't had sex with him for more than a decade or just because she doesn't treat him with the same respect she demands for herself is no excuse for him. He should live his life they way she tells him to and that's that.
You get what you deserve !!!! You are that woman who exert power in a restaurant and threatened staff ? You are that woman who asked her employee to lie for "wrong doing" ? I don't even understand why are you still in Govt post ? You should be sacked !! Now your husband is cheating on you. Good on him !!! Perhaps it was a good move and atleast he has the balls to do so. People like you don't deserve anything good. Karma b... Karma !!!!
I can't stand this apalling couple and the bullyiing way they treated the staff at Iguan Joes. They deserve everything comming to them. What nasty, nasty people they are.
give over any man that cheats next please get a life
Ha,what marriage?These people pretend they have a marriage.A marriage is based on love and trust and an affair is the utmost betrayal of trust.I do not blame Belinda though because she is as weak as the hubby.I don't know why is it hard for todays woman to kick the hubby in the ***** and tell him that his face is not to show up in the house anymore.I can just say that even the most powerful women in politics or whatever hardly do the right thing and stand their ground.Women in general always go back whilst men do not.Once the wife had an affair the hubby makes sure she gets a bad reputation as well as leaves her.Women on the other hand "fight " for their "marriage".When are they going to realize that the hubby is trying to give them a hint by having an affair.And the hint is I DONT RESPECT YOU.
her and her so called husband are horrible people that have gone around treating other people like dirt. looks like there starting to get back what they dish out , as if its happy in there home .
Trying to rebuild trust can take some time and usually can be totally repaired with couples counceling, if that's not initated it won't last. I knew a lovely woman who's husband had an affair with his teenage sweet heart and once his wife found out they played it calm and re-united 3 months later for an existing 12 month affair until he packed up his wife and kids and moved to QLD, still he contacts her and said he'll never leave his wife because the marriage is of convenient love and he adores his two children. After he'd left there were whispers that he'd had more than one affair during their 10 years together and . Poor woman!
I think once it is established why the cheating occurred in the first place then the marriage or partnership has a chance to re-establish itself. People can still love each other but no one knows whether they would cheat until placed in a situation where that love is tested.
We expect a higher standard from the people we elect into state and federal politics.if he can cheat on his wife someone he says he loves then how much easier for them to cheat on the people that put them into politices that they don't love. And they will both get a fantastic payout when they leave including a Gold Travel Pass. While the Widow of an Australian serviceman was Cheated of a life with her husband without cheating,has to try and live on $300.00. a week. Theres something Rotten in politics.
What's wrong with this woman. What kind of example is she giving. Does she think she is going to trust him each day from now on oh yes I am sure she will. If the person you are with does not respect you then why would you want to be with them. If Belinda were my daughter I would kick her in the ***. Do yourself a favor and wake up..

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